The Sussexes Have Vacated An Abusive Environment: How Have the Abusers Reacted?

The Sussexes Have Vacated An Abusive Environment

Earlier this year, I did a series of 4 articles describing the abusive behaviour and actions of The British Royal Family, UK Media towards the Sussexes, particularly Duchess Meghan– in particular the Royal Rota cartel and specific Royal sycophants in TV and Radio, and certain factions of the general public via their social media accounts. Some of those factions are about to feel the hand of the law; others remain to be seen.

We are now in the 8th month since the step down from senior Royal duties was announced, and 5 months since official freedom began. I, like all of you have watched the vitriolic fall out and venom spouted by those left behind. Truly disgusting to watch unfold.

The Duke and Duchess of Sussex were always destined to do well, but the gutter behaviour by some on view to a global audience – and God knows what went on behind the scenes – had the complete opposite effect than the protagonists expected. Harry and Meghan’s light began to glow even brighter on the world stage.

On the other hand, the over reaction by the mouthpieces of the UK Royal family and pals has been in a new spotlight, and let’s just say, they haven’t done themselves any favours. They protest too much. One wonders, why?

In my opinion the antics of all the key players in the psychological abuse of the Sussexes, and for the most part Meghan, has been an indelible stain on the United Kingdom, its aristocracy and its government. The extreme groups within the country always existed, but now they have been given an environment to openly display their views mainly because, they have taken a cue from the top. Yes there are those currently serving time for criminal acts based on those views, but there are many more out in society, who pose a serious threat to the Sussexes and to any societal group who is not deemed to be welcomed in the UK.

I don’t know what planet the Royal family and the media friends were living on, when they thought that three years of abuse would not result in some consequences. Further, that the Duchess will leave the UK, son in tow, but that somehow the Duke would just wave goodbye and stay put.
It seems that perhaps marriage vows mean something different within The Firm than outside of it. Meaning that, even though the couple swear before God to be there for better or for worse, some in the institution and the wider public who support them, fully expected Harry to choose the institution over his wife. It makes all the ‘head of the church and values talk’ seem just pharisaic.

In the world of UK Monarchy, the Firm is the centre of everything. All their actions are supposed to prolong the life of The Firm – nothing else matters. So narrow is this vision that, no one considered that they would lose the most popular Royal, next to the Queen.

I would argue that their action over the last 3 decades, together with their behaviour towards the only person of colour in their family this last three plus years, has ensured the demise of the Monarchy in the UK. It will not survive another 3 decades. People will try to blame the introduction of someone into the ‘clan’ who was not and would never be accepted into it.

In my humble opinion, the rot set in 3 decades before Meghan arrived, and now with her arrival, racism reared its head and supercharged their misogyny. For the 2nd time, The Firm were confronted by a woman with independent thought, Princess Diana being the first. Meghan was seen as a threat because of her ethnicity and her intelligence and strong mind, with a complete denial of decades of behaviour and practice gone before. She took all the frustrations and nastiness that they threw at her. Rather than fold, she stood up. HE stood up too, unwilling to subject him and his family to relentless abuse, and they walked away together as the team they were from day one. The team they told us all they were going to be.

Now, all hell has broken loose. How are the abusers handling the separation? Poorly, but let’s look at it through the lens of The Seven Stages of Grief (Following Divorce or Loss). We will use the modified Kubler-Ross Model.

7 Stages of Grief Meghan Markle Prince Harry

The 7 Stages model does not necessarily have to take place in that order, but all stages need to be covered at some point, in order to move forward. Where people have setbacks and fall into depression or anger for example, before reaching acceptance and looking ahead, it is because they have missed out one or more of the earlier stages, which has been festering in the back of their minds.

I believe that the key players in the abuse, have gone through points 1 2 & 3, and the family and the Royal Rota are edging towards stage 4. E.g. offers now apparently being mooted about the Sussexes working part time – something that was thrown out without any discussion as it was considered unworkable. Yet this apparent part time working now only seems to apply to Harry because it has been stated and implied in news stories and by a number of public figure haters that only Harry is welcome. They seem to have conceded that Meghan will not be back, but might still be in denial about why Harry left. In their minds, she made him leave, so he must want to come back right?

This presupposes that Meghan and Harry want to come back. The Sussexes certainly do not need to, and currently don’t appear to want to return. I don’t know in what realm they believe that Harry would abandon his wife and child to return, to the people who put his child and wife life at risk, as well as his own on occasions by extremists. Why would anyone return to the control of the abusers?

This of course was before the firm tested their options, which seemed to be dead on arrival. First, Charles, Camilla, William and Kate were the next fab four. God only knows what happened to that bright idea. Then of course Sophie Wessex was the next Meghan, but some thought that a Ford Fiesta was a sad replacement for a Lamborghini. Some even floated the idea of recruiting William’s friend who is married to Prince George’s teacher to for a new fab four. The struggle…

Looking at the table below you can see how some of the unfolding events/actions of the Royal Family and their media darlings have fitted into the various stages.

(Click to enlarge image)

Since the publication of a few extracts and the subsequent release of the book Finding Freedom (written by Omid Scobie and Caroline Durand), the Royal Family and the Royal Rota have been at pains to try and do damage limitation. One example that they chose to comment on, to defend their lack of any public support for Meghan relative to the media onslaught of psychological abuse, the Royal family via their spokespeople, aka courtiers and Royal Rota gave six examples of what in their opinion was the Monarchy publicly speaking up for Meghan. It matters not what the apparent 6 occasions or topics were in my mind, because over a quarter of a million articles were written about Meghan in a 12 month period, most of which were vile. So, if the best the firm could come up with is half a dozen instances of support over a 3 year period, they need to take a seat.

Because of the hatred stoked by the media against Meghan, two people are currently in prison for threatening to kill Harry for marrying a black woman. Never mind the threats collectively to Harry, Meghan and their son. Six instances… they ought to be ashamed. I suspect they aren’t ashamed though, as it was designed to be that way. It is just very inconvenient that the firm, that it is playing out so publicly.

The truth is, nothing has changed. The slave mentality still exists, now with the offer made to Harry. Come back and be a rubbing rag for your brother; do most of the work, but let him take the credit for its outputs, be a crutch to the Cambridges until their children are old enough to carry out duties, and then you can go into oblivion because we won’t need you anymore. Not in so many words, but implicit in their modus operandi. Yea right. So inviting.

There have been various attempts to make life difficult for them in Canada and subsequently when they moved to California. So much effort put into hunting down the couple to find out where and how they were living. Security was no longer provided by the Royal family from April 2020, so the UK tabloids paid for paparazzi to make life difficult for the Sussexes. Unlike the UK, privacy laws in Canada and the USA are very different, so things like flying drones 20 feet above the property where the Sussexes were staying and taking photos which have since been sold on to various outlets is against the law. Legal action is being pursued. This is just one of many attempts to force the Sussexes to return to the Royal fold, because the harassment there is of a better nature??

The signs were there. The couple took their dogs with them to Canada – a sign that home was not going to be the UK soon. When the couple came back to finish their public engagements, they did not bring their son, and Meghan soon returned to Canada while Harry stayed to finalise the terms of their exit.

All that the hateful behaviour of the Monarchy and the Royal Rota and haters in the UK has done, is speed up the iconic status that the Sussexes would have achieved anyway. Now the Sussexes are operating on a whole new level of power and interest, and the antics of the Royal family and the Royal Rota is seen as kindergarten activity. Now the international community see it for what it is, and worse than that, they view UK Royalty very different to how they used to prior to Meghan joining and now left the family.

The spectacle of the Commonwealth Day service at Westminster Abbey on 9th March 2020 is notable. The international community, both those present as well as those watching, saw the UK royalty behave so unprofessionally and so lacking grace and politeness that, they will never live that down. Never. If anyone had any doubt about the top tier of UK Royalty and their feelings towards the Sussexes, Meghan in particular, there was evidence from start to finish of how caustic those individuals behaved – in public.

Harry’s face for most of the service, when looking at his family, was a picture. He must have been ashamed of his family’s behaviour. Meghan remained serene and graceful throughout, no doubt knowing that she would be boarding a plane within hours and leaving this toxic environment once and for all. Freedom was close. Yes, Harry and Meghan waved goodbye to the Royal family and Royal Rota press gang and stepped into a world of love and appreciation and success.

Because of what has been publicly witnessed of their abysmal treatment, I believe the Sussexes will receive the support in their new work and private life that they didn’t get from their family. Well played Royal Rota. Well played courtiers. Well played Royal family. It was all avoidable but you all chose to do otherwise. You reap what you sow.

The pandemic may have slowed down and prevented some plans from even getting off the ground, yet, the number of things that the Sussexes have managed to do during the period has put the other Royals to shame.

It was recently reported that the Sussexes have purchased a home of their own and that they have been there since early July. Harry and Meghan are operating on a global stage now, securing projects and contracts with big players in the field. The Sussexes are earning their money, making their way, severing burdensome financial ties, and engaging with their charities as well as forging links with new ones. They have nowhere to go but forward.

The clowns in the Gilded Ghetto will implode soon, not least because UK taxpayers will soon be asking, why they are subsidizing one of the richest families in the world, for no measurable benefit to the country. The two people who brought in the most interest to the Royal Family along with a value-based working model, were bullied out of the country because of jealousy by weak ego driven individuals in the Royal Family. Now they have got what they wanted. Harry and Meghan are gone. The Sussexes are iconic already globally and their star is rising fast. Let’s see if the firm can move on too.

A companion podcast is embedded here for your listening pleasure.

Emotional abuse involves exposing a person to behaviour or language, through verbal speech based harassment, that can result in psychological trauma. Dependant on the circumstances, the victim may be able to sue for damages. What Constitutes Emotional Abuse?

Coercive control is an act of pattern of acts of assault, threats, harassment and intimidation or other abuse that is used to harm, punish, or frighten their victim. Coercive control creates invisible chains and a sense of fear that pervades all elements of a victim’s life.
What Is Domestic Abuse?


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30 comments on “The Sussexes Have Vacated An Abusive Environment: How Have the Abusers Reacted?

  1. WoodyPulp

    For most of the well run organizations it is very common to hire great people and let them do their jobs and the cream will rise to the top. Here the Firm was lucky to have two great people in house and if let to do their best work, the glory will be the monarch’s as they all work for her and build her legacy. The problem with the inherited position is that competency and capability are not issues here since the first born has a lock in the leadership position no matter what. Harry and Meghan were and are just too brilliant in doing their jobs (for the Queen, then and now as President and vice president of QCT) and, as sixth in line, their light was just too bright for the establishment to take (and to dim as well), so they stupidly took the “suppression” approach and inadvertently set them free and onto a bigger stage and out of their complete control. It turns out that the Firm’s discards are the world’s gain for they can now doing even wider and more comprehensive services to the communities than just royal patronages and voice their progressive thoughts openly without pre-approvals. They don’t have to proof themselves to anyone but through their actions and work they will proof all the presuppositions and innuendos spouted out by the detractors are totally off base. Integrity and honesty will prevail in the end and that is the truth.


    Bravo a Ivy. Excellent article. Le Prince Harry et sa Princesse sont partis a Montecito. Done deal, affaire conclue, clean slate; Shake the dust off your feet and wash your hands. Harry et Meghan sont a l’abris du besoin. Plus de soucis financiers. Nous sommes contents. Tout est bien qui finit bien. Rira bien qui rira le dernier. Une bataille de gagné. En avant pour les victoires futures…

  3. Alicia

    Concerning the way the Brits are shadowing everything that H&M do, although no longer living in the UK, as soon as their amazing Netflix deal was announced, i wondered how long it would take for the hit job to begin. Apparently they trolled the Netflix catalog, found a film titled Cuties and decided that Netflix was pushing child trafficking (to deflect from Andrew?) and the trolls started hashtag Cancel Netflix. Their aim is to show that Harry and Meghan have signed with a disreputable corporation that needs to be put out of business (so transparent).

  4. Cathy

    Bravo excellent article👏 j espère qu’ils vont récolter se qu ils ont semer !!! Retour à l envoyeur ❤

  5. Marina

    Excellent analysis Ivy. From my perspective, the Royal Family and their minions in the UK press are fighting a losing battle. This is a classic case of OLD unbending habits, unwilling and unable to accept the NEW way of the world. The Royal Family and the UK are stuck in old tradition, still living in old fashioned stone castles, still communicating with pen and paper and landline telephones, still travelling in horse and carriages and still wearing wigs and beef-eaters while their supporters are old, white, right-wing traditionalists. Meanwhile, Harry and Meghan are living in today’s world – dressing in today’s fashions (not granny floral or coat dresses & hats), communicating with mobile phones and social media, living in modern mansions, driving hybrid cars and their followers are the youth (children, students, young leaders of tomorrow) and forward thinking liberals who embrace diversity. They have fought and won the battle to speak for themselves, not be shackled by Palace spokespersons or Royal Rota speaking and writing twisted versions of the truth; they’ve fought and won the battle for financial independence, earning and paying their own way and not being abused for using taxpayer funds to promote an ungrateful country. England is OLD, America is NEW and Harry and Meghan will thrive both in America and globally. Well done.

  6. marena38

    Well written article the abuse she was dealt by the racist british media, royal rota, the institution & those within it’s a miracle she survived such toxic environment. It’s good that she & her family are out of there moving forward

  7. Autumn

    I was just telling my husband that the British monarchy wasn’t going to be around by 50 years.

    I’m so glad they are free from that trash island

  8. Joyce

    Thank you Ivy for your honest and detailed article about the nonsense of the royal family and the media. The royal family and the media have always underestimated Harry before he met his wife hence they have conveniently been obtuse in thinking the decision to leave was not his. Harry has put up with a lot for a long time especially since the death of his mum who was the only cheerleader. I am happy he found his soulmate and they are building their own legacy, the sky is their limit. As for those left behind good luck to them because they will need it. The world is changing and people are watching.

  9. Hellah

    All European monarchies have been modernized and are in general approachable to the public. Many have wellcomed new married-ins without difficulty and have treated them with respect. In the Netherlands, for example, Argentina-born commoner Queen Máxima is loved and even more popular than her husband King Willem Alexander or any other blood royal. The royal family and the public loved her modern, flamboyant and enthusiastic style from the start: no hate, no jealousy from other royals. By contrast, the old-fashioned British monarchy, clinging to stupid traditions, is unattractive and full of dull, half-demented, jealous, incompetent people, with very weak egos, whose day-to-day business is to fight each other in cohusion with the (tabloid) press, for PR and popularity, and based on their position in the line of succession. It doesn’t seem like much will change anytime soon as the royals and the majority of the British people – who are just as unwelcoming as their monarchy – seem unwilling to change anything. Harry and Meghan’s supporters are happy that they realized that, left and finally have their best time out of the royal family, since their wedding. They are free!

  10. Angela Best

    I believe that the BF, Courtiers, media wants to destroy H&M mainly because of Harry’s choice of a Biracial Wife. The BF wanted him to divorce Meghan like Prince Charles divorced Princess Diana. Except the difference between son and father is that Harry Love Meghan; he is an honourable man who chose to stand by his wife and his family. And to top it off the family’s disrespectful behaviour at the Commonwealth event was unthinkable. Their jealousy of H&M’s popularity, even their ability and hard work to make the Netflix deal and be independent of BF is driving them crazy. H&M are a force to be reckoned with and they don’t like it. The world is watching the demise of the BF especially because of how Meghan has been treated. This couple is hard working, actually working with the people and their charities because they enjoy this; is who they are; keep on doing what you are doing we are behind you 100 percent. Have a great day.

  11. Gladys

    An excellent read, i say to hell with the hateful jealousy of the Royal family, the envious Royal Reporters & the British Media, to the world they lost big due to their stupidity & hurray to the Sussexes for they won & still winning.

  12. C.T.

    This is an exceptional article. Eloquently written. It details the unwarranted abuse & misery Meghan suffered at the hands of the Royal Family, Royal Rota & racist British press!!!

  13. Jacqueline Matthews

    Fantastic read and a powerful article. Articulated what many have long thought of the treatment of Harry and Meghan, primarily Meghan by the royal family, royal reporters, British media and sections of the British public.

  14. Tressa Marshall

    Very well done. Every argument is supported by documented examples. Plain for the eye to see. The Sussexes are winning. May God continue to bless them.

  15. Marjorie Ireland

    I am a black woman from the Commonwealth now living in America. The Black lady sitting behind Sophie “Fiesta” Wessex and Duchess “Waity ” Kate said it all during the Commonwealth Church service! The lady was appalled and her face showed it. These 2 rude white women failed to realize or really did not care that most of people in the church were black and that disrespecting the only Black member of the UK Royal family in front of a room full of Black people was not the smart thing to do. They do not have the intelligence to see that and they are so foolishly arrogant that they believe it was ok! Well Sophie and Kate, it was not ok with the Black Commonwealth members( most are black) and it was not ok with the world. The UK “Royal Family” will reap the seeds of what they have sow. This is the tip of the iceberg. Brilliant, well written article as always!!!!!!

  16. Katryne

    Great article 👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼 Very powerful piece. Thank you Ivy❤️
    I grew up with the Diana era, and my family followed all things about Diana.
    When she died, we shelved Royal, except from time to time to check on the ginger prince. We’re proud of H and praise M for being strong and good influence to others.

    Keep going.



    I as a black brit of 66 who grow up in the UK have seen racism at different levels. I can honestly say that racism now in the uk is worst
    especially since brexit. I am a widow and a grand-mother of a biracial granddaughter and cannot begin to tell how hurtful it as been for me to witness what happened to Meghan. We all saw the tell tale signs at the wedding 2018, we saw the behaviour of the royal family the complete disrespect they showed when the choir sang and the sermon by the black minister Rev Curry. We all saw the laughing and the giggling and the look on the queens face said it all. We knew then that she was not accepted into that family she was used to make them all look good especially to the world and the people of the commonwealth which are 95% black. The queen as the head wanted us the black people to believe that her family had welcome Meghan. We saw different. The abuse by the RF the tabloids, the media, and the royal rotas was despicable racist and vile. I have the ultimate respect for prince Harry for not willing to make his family become the sacrificial lamb to make the rest of his family look good. As far as I am concern PRINCE HARRY IS KING THE REAL DEAL.

  18. clara washington

    Another great article. I do wonder if the British people will ever wake up and see they get nothing for all the millions they give the royals in their tax money.

    1. Patricia Grant

      The penny will finally drop especially with the economic mess the country is in. They will so realise that they will be giving the queen an estimated £6million pay rise while the rest of us will take a pay cut. Look at whats happening to the amazing NHS workers who have sacrifice so much, some with their lives. The royal family didn’t mind coming out to clap but now that they should be rewarded for their amazing work they’re not. Thats gratitude for you.

  19. Rita

    Wow so powerful you have articulated what I have long thought the Sussex’s had asked for so little a change to their own working practices and support from the institution in rejecting them they have set them free to be supported by the rest of the world UK loss is the world’s gain.

  20. Charmaine

    Great piece of info. U couldn’t have said it better. It is impeccable that ppl read this , very important. I enjoyed reading it.

  21. Connie Brussels

    Well, another master piece article!!!!!!👍👍well done and thank you.Keep it coming!!!!!!we appreciate!!!!!

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